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10 Behaviors Display By People With Low Self-Esteem Without Realizing It, No3 Will Shock You
Ever find yourself saying sorry for things that aren’t your fault? Or maybe you’re a master at backhanded self-compliments, like saying you did well on a test ‘by accident’?
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I get it. I used to do things like that, too. Until a friend kindly asked me why I kept putting myself down.
That’s when I realized that these behaviors showed the world just how lacking in confidence I was.
You see, sometimes without us realizing it, we behave in ways that reflect our self-image. And just like people can tell when someone’s confident, they can also tell when someone’s struggling with low self-esteem.
So let’s take a look at 10 common behaviors people with low self-esteem do, often without them realizing it.
If these resonate with you, it might be time to address some hidden insecurities.
1) Apologizing excessively
We all say “I’m sorry” from time to time. It’s a fundamental part of human interaction, a way to show empathy, acknowledge mistakes, and maintain healthy relationships.
But what happens when “sorry” becomes a constant refrain in your vocabulary? When it’s no longer about righting wrongs but rather an automatic response to everything, even when you’re not at fault?
This could be a sign of low self-esteem. People who continually apologize often do so because they feel they’re a burden or are constantly doing something wrong.
That’s exactly how I used to be, as I mentioned earlier. I’d even preface almost every question with “sorry” because, I don’t know, I guess I used to see myself as unworthy or as an inconvenience to others.
It took a great deal of mindfulness for me to break this habit. But eventually I was able to do it, so if this is a habit of yours, I’m pretty sure you can, too!
2) Constant self-criticism
Remember how I said I often felt unworthy? Well, that’s a clear example of internal dialogue.
And that’s something we all have, a voice in our head that narrates our lives. This voice can be encouraging and supportive, pushing us to strive for our goals.
Research in psychology suggests that those with low self-esteem often have a harsh and relentless internal critic. They may constantly berate themselves for perceived failures or shortcomings, overlooking their achievements and positive attributes.
This constant self-criticism can lead to a negative self-perception and reinforce feelings of unworthiness.
If you find your inner voice is more often than not filled with negative self-talk, it might be time to address the root cause of this critical perspective.
It might help to remember that everyone makes mistakes and has shortcomings—it’s part of being human. Cultivating a kinder, more forgiving internal dialogue can significantly improve your self-esteem and overall mental wellbeing.
3) Seeking validation from others
So, because the inner critic in people with low self-esteem is so hard to please, where do they tend to get approval?
From other people.
That’s pretty understandable — we all like to feel accepted and valued, and there’s nothing wrong with appreciating the approval of others.
However, when we start seeking validation externally rather than from within, it can become problematic.
I recall a time when I became excessively focused on gaining the approval of my colleagues. My self-worth became directly linked to their praise and recognition.
When I achieved it, I felt great, but when I didn’t, my self-esteem did a nose dive.
Looking back, I realize that this was a glaring sign of my low self-esteem at the time.
There’s no getting around it — self-worth is an inside job. It should come from within and not be reliant on the opinions of others. Learning to validate yourself is a crucial step in building a healthier self-esteem.
4) Difficulty accepting compliments
Strangely, even as I sought external validation, I struggled to accept compliments. In fact, every time someone gave me one, I’d reply with a backhanded compliment to myself.
Like, “Oh, I have no idea why I aced that test — it must have been luck!”
Or, “Yeah, it’s a nice painting, but really, anyone can do it!”
I know now that this struggle with accepting compliments was a result of my low self-esteem. People who do this believe that they’re not deserving of compliments.
Essentially, they have a distorted view of their worth and abilities, so they doubt the sincerity of the compliment. Which goes back to that harsh inner critic we talked about earlier.
But I know better now. I’ve learned to see my accomplishments and qualities as worthy of recognition and praise.
So these days, when someone gives me a compliment, all I say in return is, “Thank you” and leave it at that!
5) Fear of confrontation
Confrontation is a part of life that many of us would rather avoid. It can be uncomfortable, challenging, and even scary at times.
However, it’s a necessary aspect of human interaction, allowing us to express our feelings, assert our boundaries, and resolve conflicts.
But for some of us, the old me included, confrontation can feel like an insurmountable hurdle.
I remember a situation where a friend had upset me. Rather than discussing it with them and expressing my feelings, I chose to internalize it. I was afraid that standing up for myself might lead to conflict or potentially damage the relationship.
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10 Behaviors Display By People With Low Self-Esteem Without Realizing It, No1 Will Shock You
Source:experteditor.com.au
